Monday, March 18, 2013

it's evolution, baby

It is pretty clear to me now, that this plain fancy life is becoming more a way for me to chronicle my life, and less about my craft business.  It is a bittersweet transformation, for me.  While, as I've said before, I do love crafting, my life is ever changing, as I evolve and change as an aging human.
I have never been a social creature.  Never been one for a packed social calendar.  Almost never have the urge to invite friends over.  I've never been the one in the group to say, 'hey...let's go grab lunch'.  I've always been 'the invited', the 'tag-along', the 'follower'.  I like to stay home.  Crafting had become a way for me to keep myself busy AT outlet for my creativity and a way to de-stress without leaving the house.
But, just as I've found my safe haven, my little nest of security and certainty, I am changing again.
I've been called 'fickle', 'moody', and yes 'whishy-washy'...and, I've never been offended, because I know they are all spot on adjectives to describe me.
I feel like a bit of a cad going through this struggle to decide to change my name, jump feet first into trying to re-brand and sell myself to retailers...just to be woo-ed away by the call of roller derby.  But it has happened...
We have only so much time in our days, and we must pick and choose which activities will bring us the most joy.  Do I know that roller derby will bring me more joy than making jewelry?  Well, it's hard  impossible to say right now, but it is something I must find out.  I could be typing a new post next month saying I'm done with derby and I'm returning to my craft business.  I could say next week that I have been able to find time for both.  I could be mauled by a tiger never knows, but one must find out!
In all honesty, in prioritizing and trying to make some sense of my life, I feel like my jewelry has become a way to make money.  And that is the kiss of death when you're in a creative business.  I love making jewelry and especially when I can make jewelry AND play with paper!  But I'm excited about my auto repair class and it's ultimate purpose of getting me outside fixing that Barracuda.  And I'm excited about skating.  Unfortunately, these two activities alone are taking up a considerable portion of my life.
Once my car class is finished, and roller derby practices/meetings are more structured and consistent, then I will be able to re-evaluate my scheduling.
I believe each of these three activities (roller derby, car project, jewelry making) can co-exist in my life's just taking longer to figure out how with everything sort of happening at once.
Timing is everything, and it's never been my strong suit!

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